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I’m the wife. And yes, I’m the best wife in the world!

June 3, 2011

He’s what? Why? And you’re ok with this? Wow! He’s so brave. You’re the best wife in the world.

These are the questions and comments I get each and every time I tell someone that Randall is off sailing around the Pacific alone for the next year  eighteen months. I start to laugh as soon as the look of incredulity spreads across the face of the person I’m talking to. The questions and the open-mouthed gape are the same each and every time the reality of what I’ve just said dawns on the listener. The good news is that I’ve got really good at answering the questions and REALLY good at humbly accepting the title of Best Wife in the World.

It occurred to me that the folks on here might be interested in hearing the answers too. Plus really, I’m thoroughly amused by the whole thing so I thought you might find it amusing too. Just know that you’re getting me answering the questions, not my poetic husband. When it comes to writing style Randall is to Arthur Miller as I am to Marilyn Munroe. You have been warned.

Let me start at the beginning. I start all the way back then as the beginning was August 2001 on my second date with Randall.  He mentioned casually that he’d always dreamed of going on a long distance sailing trip. I was still in that rose colored glasses phase of the relationship so my response was something to the tune of “Oooo really? How lovely! I Luuuurve sailing.  Did I tell you I came from a long line of sailors? How romantic, sailing together around the world.”  Blah blah blah … Lucky for me this didn’t totally scare him off. Lucky for him ten years have passed, and while the glasses came off the idea was firmly planted.

I learned a lot about Randall over the ten years. I learned that he really really really wanted sail off into the sunset and explore. It was a frequent topic of conversation over many evenings anchored out on Murre on the San Francisco bay. While I’d wistfully coo over the adorable multi-million dollar cottages tucked up on the shore just above our anchorage, he’d be talking about where, when and how he’d set out on his journey. Really, we’re a match made in heaven. Can’t you tell? 

Randall had a big dream. However, the more important thing I learned about Randall was that the idea of actually going on this great voyage was 100% scary. Like parachuting out of a plane scary. It looks and sounds totally awesome; but you have to actually jump, jump out of a plane!  And, like most of us with a slightly frightening dream, finding some excuse NOT to accomplish the dream is often easier than the doing part.

Now if you know me, you know I’m one of those people who jumps and jumps with some frequency. Parachuting? Yes! I’m totally in!  Randall however, is not much of a jumper. He starts to think about silly things like 15,000 feet in the air and the ground. Jumping bad. Jumping scary. And when it came to a grand voyage, what would be a really easy excuse to delay jumping?  You got it, the wife.  I figured out pretty quickly that with the jumping and the wife excuse, I’d practically have to shove the Randall and boat under the Golden Gate Bridge myself.

Randall – honey, I love you, but you know what I just wrote is true.

So that’s what I did. We set some reasonable guidelines on the when part of the equation, aka have enough money in the bank to pay your half of the mortgage when you’re gone.  And as soon as that requirement looked like it would be a reality, Randall moved (and I gently nudged) into planning mode. I transformed into the ever adoring and supporting wife mode. I spouted words like “yes”, “absolutely”, “of course”, “why not?”.  I encouraged and supported Randall to the very edge and in the end didn’t need to push him out the plane. And I cheered and clapped as Randall jumped.

Well, ok. It wasn’t quite like that. But close. I am the best wife ever. Remember?

All kidding aside, I couldn’t be happier for Randall. He’s getting to live his dream. And who of us really have such an amazing and fabulous dream like that? I don’t know many people who do so there was NO WAY I was going to stop someone who did. And on the jumping part? Well, I believe that by doing this very scary and amazing thing I’m going to get an even more interesting person for a husband.

Don’t worry about me. Yes, I miss Randall a lot. But I’m having a bit of an adventure too. I get to have the coolest story in pretty much any situation. AND I have to fly to tropical locations to meet up with him. Really? Can you feel bad for someone who’s forced to go to Tahiti? Yeah, I didn’t think so either.

So here we are, both living our own adventure in our own way. Jumping.

See you in Paradise.



  1. Wendy permalink
    June 3, 2011 11:12 pm

    Best wife with the coolest job, life’s good. Glad to hear all is well

    • Wendy permalink
      June 3, 2011 11:14 pm

      When does the ship sail to Asia? Be sure to plan plenty of visits then!


  1. No, he hasn’t sunk the boat. Update from the BWW. « Murre and the Pacific

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